Score One For Corporate America

I recently did something incredibly stupid, as detailed in the letter below. The letter is pretty self-explanatory; all you need to know in addition is that the CD box set in question has those annoying built-in CD holders that cannot be separated from the box set and which are invariably made of a very hard plastic that breaks too easily.

To: Dr.Rhino@rhino.com
Subject: Help Me, I Am an Idiot
Sent: Thursday, April 19, 2007 2:38 PM

Dear Dr. Rhino:

I am writing to seek your help, because I am an idiot.

I recently--as in yesterday --received as a gift Rhino's "Have A Nice Decade" box set. Like all your products, it is great and I love it.

Unfortunately, because I am an idiot, I have done something incredibly idiotic. One of the teeth of one of the CD holders in the box set was damaged, and as a result one of the discs kept falling out. I attempted to repair the wobbly tooth with Krazy Glue. This was idiotic move number 1, and of course It did not work. Idiotic move number 2 was failing to move the discs far, far away from the area to which I was attempting this repair. This is how I got Krazy Glue on the playing surfaces of discs 1 and 2, and this is why they no longer play.

I understand that you are under no obligation whatsoever to replace these discs. However, I am a loyal Rhino customer and a full-fledged idiot, so I figured I would write you to beg mercy. Is there any way I can replace these two discs without having to purchase the complete box set again? If you could help me with this I would be forever in your debt and would promise to do my best to avoid future Rhino-impacting acts of idiocy on my part.

Sincerely,

Tom Meltzer, idiot

The response was three weeks in coming but was, ultimately, edifying:

Dear Tom,

Please send your damaged discs to:

Rhino Customer Service
Attn. Mac Dunlop
3400 West Olive Ave. 5th Floor
Burbank, CA 91505

We'll send you replacements. Please include your mailing address and a copy of your email (or a note detailing your request). Please allow 4-6 weeks for delivery.

Dr. Rhino

Kudos to Rhino Records. Extra credit for resisting the temptation to address me as "Tom Meltzer, idiot."